I had given 2017 at least a solid twenty days before making my final assessment on it’s progression. I invariably overanalyze that last week of December each year to the degree of partial insanity, or at least that’s what my temporary seasonal dramatics make me feel like in the interim.
2016 was unequivocally the worst of my 27 full years, granted the first few years of my life weren’t quite memorable yet, but surely nothing too negatively vital of importance took place then. I’ll never know, I was a little one, but there’s photo proof that those years were a hoot, aside from the broken leg at age two. Last year wasn’t just miserable because of politics or because another year lapsed and I still hadn’t found that favorite ring of mine. I mean, you can only pray to St. Anthony so many times for lost things before you truly have to just give up and move on. It was a deplorable year for far divergent reasons. I fought like hell for myself, I challenged myself. For what felt like the very first time, I, in a genuine fashion, allowed myself to be truly selfish in a positive way. Sounds like an oxymoron, but as a matter of fact, it was in the form of empowerment, devotedly focusing on myself, applying all the time possible to surpass my weaknesses.
I evoked a desire to improve, not that this craving was new, but afore, I wasn’t strong enough or didn’t trust that I was. Slowly but surely I was making the calls taking the steps to ultimately funnel myself to the path of cerebral success.
The best analogy I can compare this pathway to is going bowling. You opt to get those bumpers put up to lessen your odds of failure, primarily because you have been down on luck. There is no guarantee will you knock all the pins down in the first few rolls, but that’s not the point. Wether your bowling ball bounces off the bumper 45 times down the lane or wether you roll a strait shot down the middle, the ball with eventually reach the pins either way. You’ll still get there, I will still get there. I am getting there. You rarely get there seemlessly in the first few attempts. But, we will get there.
So with a new year, 25 days deep, and last year’s lessons, learnings and staggering growth, I am hopeful for prosperity, self-motivated and hard-earned victory. I know I deserve it.
I’ve have been known to succumb when darkness prevails, but no longer will I falter.